By: Carol Kinsey Goman, Ph.D.
The effective use of body language plays a key role in
effective communication. Here are ten tips I’ve learned during the past two
decades of coaching teams around the world:
1. To boost your confidence, assume a power pose
Research at Harvard and Columbia Business Schools shows that
simply holding your body in expansive, “high-power” poses (leaning back with
hands behind the head and feet up on a desk, or standing with legs and arms
stretched wide open) for as little as two minutes stimulates higher levels of testosterone—the
hormone linked to power and dominance—and lower levels of cortisol, a stress
hormone.
Try this when you’re feeling tentative but want to appear
confident. In addition to causing hormonal shifts in both males and females,
these poses lead to increased feelings of power and a higher tolerance for
risk. The study also found that people are more often influenced by how they
feel about you than by what you're saying.
2. To increase participation, look like you’re listening
If you want people to speak up, don’t multitask while they
do. Avoid the temptation to check your text messages, check your watch, or
check out how the other participants are reacting. Instead, focus on those who
are speaking by turning your head and torso to face them directly and by making
eye contact. Leaning forward, nodding, and tilting your head are other
nonverbal ways to show you’re engaged and paying attention. It’s important to
hear people. It’s just as important to make sure they know you are listening.
3. To encourage collaboration, remove barriers
Physical obstructions are especially detrimental to
collaborative efforts. Take away anything that blocks your view or forms a
barrier between you and the rest of the team. Even during a coffee break, be
aware that you may create a barrier by holding your cup and saucer in a way
that seems deliberately to block your body or distance you from others. A
senior executive told me he could evaluate his team’s comfort by how high they
held their coffee cups. It was his observation that the more insecure
individuals felt, the higher they held their coffee. People with their hands
held at waist level were more comfortable than those with hands chest high.
4. To connect instantly with someone, shake hands
Touch is the most primitive and powerful nonverbal cue.
Touching someone on the arm, hand, or shoulder for as little as 1/40 of a
second creates a human bond. In the workplace, physical touch and warmth are
established through the handshaking tradition, and this tactile contact makes a
lasting and positive impression. A study on handshakes by the Income Center for
Trade Shows showed that people are two times more likely to remember you if you
shake hands with them. The trade show researchers also found that people react
to those with whom they shake hands by being more open and friendly.
5. To stimulate good feelings, smile
A genuine smile not only stimulates your own sense of
well-being, it also tells those around you that you are approachable,
cooperative, and trustworthy. A genuine smile comes on slowly, crinkles the
eyes, lights up the face, and fades away slowly. Most importantly, smiling
directly influences how other people respond to you. When you smile at someone,
they almost always smile in return. And, because facial expressions trigger
corresponding feelings, the smile you get back actually changes that person’s
emotional state in a positive way.
6. To show agreement, mirror expressions and postures
When clients or business colleagues unconsciously imitate
your body language, it’s their way of nonverbally saying that they like or
agree with you. When you mirror other people with intent, it can be an
important part of building rapport and nurturing feelings of mutuality.
Mirroring starts by observing a person’s facial and body gestures and then
subtly letting your body take on similar expressions and postures. Doing so
will make the other person feel understood and accepted.
7. To improve your speech, use your hands
Brain imaging has shown that a region called Broca’s area,
which is important for speech production, is active not only when we’re
talking, but when we wave our hands. Since gesture is integrally linked to
speech, gesturing as we talk can actually power up our thinking.
Whenever I encourage executives and others to incorporate
gestures into their deliveries, I consistently find that their verbal content
improves. Experiment with this and you’ll find that the physical act of
gesturing helps you form clearer thoughts and speak in tighter sentences with
more declarative language.
8. To learn the truth, watch people’s feet
When people try to control their body language, they focus
primarily on facial expressions, body postures, and hand/arm gestures. Since
the legs and feet are left unrehearsed, they are also where the truth can most
often be found. Under stress, people will often display nervousness and anxiety
through increased foot movements. Feet will fidget, shuffle, and wind around
each other or around the furniture. Feet will stretch and curl to relieve
tension, or even kick out in a miniaturized attempt to run away. Studies show
that observers have greater success judging a person’s real emotional state
when they can see the entire body. You may not know it, but instinctively
you’ve been reacting to foot gestures all your life.
9. To sound authoritative, keep your voice down
Before a speech or important telephone call, allow your
voice to relax into its optimal pitch (a technique I learned from a speech
therapist) by keeping your lips together and making the sounds “um hum, um hum,
um hum.” And if you are a female, watch that your voice doesn’t rise at the
ends of sentences as if you are asking a question or seeking approval. Instead,
when stating your opinion, use the authoritative arc, in which your voice
starts on one note, rises in pitch through the sentence and drops back down at
the end.
10. To improve your memory, uncross your arms and legs
Body language researchers Allan and Barbara Pease report a
fascinating finding from one of their studies: When a group of volunteers
attended a lecture and sat with unfolded arms and legs, they remembered 38%
more than a group that attended the same lecture and sat with folded arms and
legs. To improve your retention, uncross your arms and legs. If you see your
audience exhibiting defensive body language, change tactics, take a break, or
get them to move—and don’t try to persuade them until their bodies open up.
If you follow these 10 simple and powerful body language
tips, I guarantee you’ll increase your nonverbal impact in the workplace.
About the Author(s)
Carol Kinsey Goman, Ph.D. is an executive coach, leadership
consultant, and international keynote speaker at corporate, government, and
association events. She is the author of The Nonverbal Advantage: Secrets and
Science of Body Language at Work. Her
newest book is The Silent Language of Leaders: How Body Language Can Help—or
Hurt How You Lead. For more information, contact: CGoman@CKG.com or visit:
http://www.nonverbaladvantage.com/ and http://www.ckg.com/
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